Complications of Two in Ones
by skullcakesryummy
Summary: He’d been shopping for shampoo, his favorite two-in-one with the additional conditioner—he didn’t have time to lather twice—when she called out. Short crack, I guess. One-shot. Please Review.


**Complications of Two-in-Ones**

A SuiSaku One-shot. Mostly just because it seemed like what I was into. It's mostly just pointless whatever--so if you're expecting something then I'm sorry to say that it's simply nothing. I think I just wanted to post something that wasn't all intense and stuff. But anyways,  
ENJOY.

*

He'd been shopping for shampoo, his favorite two-in-one with the additional conditioner—he didn't have time to lather twice—when she called out.

Being a missing-nin automatically made being overly cautious second-nature. Being a missing-nin escapee from Orochimaru while being hunted down by nearly every other shinobi just added that extra little kick. He didn't have time to screw up—let alone risk it. In the small department store, Suigetsu had assumed he would've been safe. He was in the _hair product _aisle for god sakes.

Still though, that didn't change the fact that he had been found by the little rosette-haired girl.

_Sasuke's_ little rosette-haired girl. Who had found him in the _hair product section_.

She'd tapped him politely on the arm while two different products had been in either hand—there was a sale. As he glanced over his shoulder, leather bound handle slightly obstructing his view while lists of chemicals continued to run through his mind, he hadn't really processed the wind-chilled bundle behind him. The runaway didn't even realize how the kunoichi had managed to come so close to him unnoticed. It wasn't that he hadn't seen her—he'd been sharing the aisle with her for the past seven minutes—but it was rather unsettling for her to have sneaked so close without his muscles clenching in preparation.

And so, he supposed, the first words that flitted from her mouth were just as equally, if not more, _un_settling.

"Can we go outside for a few minutes?"

He blinked, dark purple eyes flashing in startling contrast with his pale features. _She wanted to…_? "What for?" It never hurt to be sure. If she wanted to do _those_ sorts of things in the alley outside, he'd be happy to accommodate. But then again, she'd said it would only take a few minutes. Her inquiry was driving him to insanity, to be sure, but that didn't necessarily mean that he didn't _enjoy_ it.

Stopping the images forming in his head, Suigetsu narrowed his eyes when the girl hesitated in responding. The hand that had once tapped softly against his arm wrapped itself securely around his wrist. "It won't take long," Lowering her voice into a sensuous whisper, Sakura greedily tugged on the young man's hand. "I swear,"

_Well_, he thought delightedly. _All work and no play makes Sui_—

_Wait_.

Gaze returning to the bottles in either hand, the criminal considered them dryly. He would hate to deny the alluring Leaf-nin what she so desperately wanted, but he had a goddamned choice to make. Besides—a frown twisted the shinobi's lips after taking into account that he held the last bottle in stock of his favorite brand—who knew if it would be there when he got back. If he _ever_ got back.

"I've got to…" He trailed off aimlessly, eyes still searching the labels littering each shampoo.

Apparently, his heart wrenching voice had caused the ill-intent hidden behind her previous words to slowly die out. "Got to what?" She questioned sympathetically, free hand moving from its place at her side to join its partner in wrapping around the nin's arm. "I can probably do something to…" When two different bottles of equally shifty looking hair-care was shoved quite unceremoniously into her face, Sakura allowed her next words to die in her throat.

"Which one?" The inquiry was curt as the criminal awaited an immediate answer. Taking both choices into her hands, the pinklette regarded each one intently. Her reply came seconds later, although it wasn't one Suigetsu had been expecting to hear.

"Neither," Her tone left no room for argument, though when the water-obsessed shinobi raised a fine eyebrow in response, Sakura forced herself to explain the basics of normal shampooing and simple conditioning. "These are both two-in-one." She bit out, throwing each bottle onto the closest shelf before gliding down the aisle casually while taking in all the new options. "They don't actually _do_ two-in-one." She continued after she felt his arm brush against her side, indicating he'd followed. "You're only shampooing—if even that." Sakura told herself that the noise that fell past her lips was most definitely not a squeak of surprise when the missing-nin casually wrapped an arm around her waist.

She also told herself that the nose skimming lightly across the crook of her neck was not a nice as it really felt. _God_, she thought vapidly, while turning to give the sharp-toothed man a light-hearted glare. _He's going to be trouble_.

"You smell good, kunoichi." At her lack of an appropriate retort, Suigetsu's smirk turned into something highly dangerous, saved for only the most momentous of occasions. "You don't mind," Lowering his head and being all too pleased with the way jade eyes flashed, the criminal's voice turned velvety. "Do you?" He all but purred.

Blinking, Sakura made a quick slip from the Mist-nin's arms and only ignored him when he proceeded to sling an arm around her shoulders. Her gaze was locked on a bottle of high-quality shampoo. Its counterpart conditioner sat nearby. "This," Hastily grabbing a bottle and directing it towards the man, Sakura couldn't help her bemused smile at his immediate interest. "Is what you're looking for."

There was a steady pause of silence where Sakura held her breath and Suigetsu scanned the bottle suspiciously. "I don't have dandruff," He argued suddenly and the rosette-haired girl was at a loss for what to say. "And I don't have enough freakin' time to wash twi—"

"How the hell do you know you don't have dandruff!?" Fisting a hand in the shinobi's scalp Sakura went on by pulling his head down to eye level. "You probably can't even see it if there is any, you know. Your stupid hair's the same goddamned colour!"

"Oi! Don't give me that crap, _Pinky_—as if you're one to talk—"

"I'm not the indecisive one whose been standing here for the past ten minutes!" Throwing her hands into the air in utter frustration she somehow managed to grab the matching conditioner from its spot and chuck it at the unprepared shinobi. "And I don't give a crap if you don't have enough time—fucking _make some_." Left huffing and angry in front of the silent missing-nin Sakura simply stood there as she waited for him to say _some_thing.

When he opened his mouth, sharpened teeth just visible, the medic tensed. "Hey," Tilting her head to the side and allowing her muscles to loosen at his teasing voice, Sakura meant for him to go on. "You were on Sasuke's old team, right?" Although it wasn't exactly the best thing to say, and although Suigetsu was pretty damn sure it was the infamous love-struck kunoichi before him, he had to be sure. On their journeys, hearing whispers about monstrous strength and perfect chakra control had haunted their path. Every now and again, their team leader would demand names and Suigetsu knew that every time he heard the rumors he was just dying to analyze his old pink-haired teammate. Because really, what would poor Sasuke do if she wasn't the weak little girl he remembered?

The pinklette clenched her jaw slightly. Yea, she was kind of over the psychotic, pin-wheel eyed prick, but even the mention of his name brought back unfavorable memories. Thoughts of snakes and twirling tattoos and cold stone benches littered her thoughts before she answered. "Yeah," She managed to grumble. "_Un_fortunately," Raising an eyebrow nonchalantly in barely concealed surprise, the missing-nin waited for some sort of explanation. He certainly hadn't been expecting her response to be decidingly negative. "Well," She ran a hand through her hair before waving it dispassionately in the air around her. "He is sort of a really big asshole."

"Mmmm," Suigetsu nodded his head in agreement, the traces of a smirk just barely visible.

"And well, no offense to you—I mean you're not as crazy as you look—," He didn't even attempt to make any sort of comment about her (pink) hair as she paused. "But he was really stupid to give up everything for some stupid revenge which really just makes him as bad as his brother. But I guess Uchihas are just all the same." She droned finally. "All up and happy at the thought of murdering their own brother," She snorted lightly to herself. "Doesn't his goal in life kind of contradict itself? He wants to avenge his clan by killing the only other remaining member of it."

Her fists clenched automatically. "He's just _so_ goddamned retarded!"

"Yep," There was a small, barely noticeable hesitation. "Definitely—"

"And if he was really as smart as he thought he was, Sasuke would know that killing his brother is most certainly the wrong thing to do." Sakura blinked. "Instead he should convince Itachi to… _elope_ or something. You know, like, start working on faze two. _Re_viving the clan."

Suigetsu took a small step back reflexively at the new presence standing behind the infuriated kunoichi. "I think—"

"God, don't tell me that's what he keeps that redhead around for." Cracking her knuckles methodically Sakura laughed sweetly at the man in front of her. "_Wait_," Her eyes flashed. "Don't tell me that's what he keeps _you_ around for—"

"Sakura,"

She didn't even twitch at his voice, although it was all too familiar. In fact, she didn't even turn around. Instead, flitting over to the shocked Mist-nin, Sakura spun around before linking her arm through his. "Anyways," Not even glancing at the new addition to their party, Sakura twirled the two of them back to face the opposite end of the aisle. Suigetsu didn't even argue when she switched her innocent little hand to wind around his waist, forcing her to come closer.

"Where are we going, kunoichi?" He didn't really care all that much. He was still inwardly laughing at the barely interpreted emotion of shock on the young team leader's face. It was simply priceless. Snapping from his short reverie, Suigetsu realized that his new little pink-haired friend had said something. Blinking fiercely and trying desperately to remember, the silver-haired shinobi found that he was totally screwed.

"Sorry—what did you say there, sweetheart?"

Sakura's cheeks lit up slightly and Suigetsu only noticed because she didn't turn away in time. "I _said_ that we're going outside like I said we would earlier." Snapping her head back in his direction, now composed, the medic smiled mischievously. "Though I may have to keep you longer then I—"

"Sakura,"

There was no way for her to ignore the stoic avenger now. With the raven-haired man appearing before her, the two of them were forced to come to an immediate stop. Suigetsu could nearly taste the tension surging between the old teammates. He waited though, since he was stuck—literally—on the spot. He only felt the faint clench of the kunoichi's fist against his hip. If she hadn't had her arm wrapped around him then he was sure he never would've witnessed such a subdued reaction.

"Ahhh," Hiding the smile that was forcing its way out, the Mist-nin simply watched as Sakura lightly flipped her hair over her shoulder. Turning his attention back to the infamous brooding Sharingan user, he awaited a reaction. The smirk he expected to see in response to the kunoichi's defiance fell flat. "Sasuke-kun," Knowing that the rosette-haired girl wasn't quite finished, both men waited patiently. "Are you shopping for shampoo as well?" Not even waiting for an answer Sakura casually slipped her arm from around Suigetsu's waist before walking up to the man she'd given her heart to on a platter.

"What a pleasant coincidence!" Her gleeful expression abruptly dropped when her foot connected with his shin. "_Dick_,"

Skipping backwards and replacing her arm to where it was wrapped around his waist, Suigetsu feigned nonchalance as he pulled her closer.

"I'm a little confused about your intentions, kunoichi." His voice was lined with false and teasing bravado as the couple strolled past the shinobi doubled over against the cool concrete of the shop.

"Oh," Her smile lit up at the casual flirting. "Well, if you must know," Standing on her tiptoes while gripping on the shinobi's shoulder so that he'd meet her half way her lips just barely brushed Suigetsu's ear. "I'm trying to seduce you—"

The shampoo bottle fell from his free hand before he lifted the kunoichi into his arms. Sakura's startled gasp and following giggles caused a smirk to form on Suigetsu's own lips.

"Mmmm, you can show me how to wash properly." At her small glare, a pair of bone white, pointed teeth flickered into view. He caught the warning. "While you're up against the wall as I lick—"

"I get it." With a wave of her hand, the two of them were walking through the exit of the store. "Now lead the way."

He licked his lips. "Sure thing, sweetheart."

End.

*

Yay. So there you go. I'm sorry if some of the characters aren't really acting themselves. I don't really read the manga so I'm not exactly a pro at them. If you have anything positive to say, then please review. Thanks :)


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